Personal Growth Cafe

Using a budget is one of the best ways for you to determine where you stand financially so you can plan for future expenses.

A budget can help you live within your means, get out of debt, and have money available for a new car, vacation, or education.

Planning and using a budget doesn’t have to be complicated.

Plus, once you’ve put your budget into place, it makes spending decisions a snap.

Here’s how to plan your budget, step-by-step:

1. Set goals. Before you begin to plan, it’s important to know what your financial goals are.

Do you want to save for a new home?

Have you always wanted to travel overseas?

Are you thinking about your children’s educational future?

Write down your family’s financial goals and post them where everyone can see them.

This will help you all remain focused on reaching your goals rather than giving in to temptations to buy things you don’t need.

2. Determine income. Figure out how much money you currently have coming into your home.

It’s hard to establish a budget if you don’t know how much money you have at your disposal. This would include:

Employment income for each family member contributing to the budget

Interest earned from money markets, savings accounts, or investments

Inheritances

Any other form of income

3. Figure out your expenses. Write down your family’s expenses.

Listing each bill will help you determine how much money you need to earn each month to reach your financial goals.

List every bill your family has regardless of how often it’s paid.

Group expenses together (insurances, credit cards, etc.) to make them easier to calculate.

Include cash for each day, such as money for gas, lunches, tolls or parking.

4. Include savings. Remember to pay yourself!

Instead of waiting to determine what money is left after paying the monthly bills, include your savings account as a bill and pay it just as you would any other expense.

5. Subtract expenses from income. Add together all income sources and then add together all expenses.

Subtract the expenses from the income, and this will tell you what financial shape your family is in.

6. If your income is greater than your expenses… If you have money left after paying the bills, you may choose to do one of the following:

Put additional money in savings.

Invest the money with the help of a financial planner.

Pay off credit cards or other monthly credit accounts so you can get out of debt.

7. If your expenses are greater than your income… If your expenses are more than your income, you have some decisions to make.

They may not be pleasant, but if you want to get out of the avalanche of debt, changes are necessary.

Here are some changes you may want to make:

If your home is too large for your family, you may want to downsize into a home with cheaper payments.

Do you have, and do you need, more than one vehicle?

If two or more cars are necessary, by all means keep them.

However, you may be able to buy vehicles that are cheaper to own and maintain.

If all the cars aren’t necessary, why not sell the extra ones?

Avoid eating out. You may not think eating out is that expensive, but a family of four can easily spend $40 or more each time they eat out.

That same amount of money can buy groceries for several meals, instead of just one.

Put a hold on credit card spending.

Either cut your credit cards up or put them in a plastic bag filled with water.

Place the bag in the freezer and leave it there.

As you’re able to pay off one credit card, close the account.

Then use the money you spent each month on that bill and add it to your payment for the credit card with the next highest interest rate.

This process accelerates the elimination of your debt.

It’s possible to create a budget you and your family can live with.

By following these step-by-step instructions for planning a budget, you’ll be taking a financial step in the right direction.

Stick to your budget, and before you know it you can be out of debt and saving for something special!

How much of your budget goes to things you want?

How does proper budgeting bring joy to your life?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

Also, as your gift for taking this to heart – and this is profoundly important… to us ALL – go to UnitingPlanetEarth.com/ignition/ and do the Uniting Planet Earth 7-Day Quick-Start Ignition Program… and Allow it to Transform Your Life.

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October 19, 2018February 15, 2018

I allow myself to rise above the challenges by being proactive.

October 19, 2018February 15, 2018

Solutions to Overcoming Addiction

When you think of the word addiction, the first thing that comes to your mind may be alcohol or drugs.

However, there are many other types of addictions that you may experience, including addictions to food, cigarettes, shopping, gambling and many other things.

These addictions seem to have power of their own.

They can control your thoughts, actions, and your very life, if you let them.

If you think you might be suffering from an addiction, it’s great to know that there are techniques you can use every day to help you overcome your addictions and take back control of your life.

Here are some helpful solutions:

1. Have faith. In order to overcome addiction, the first thing you need is faith. Faith has been described as the “hope of things unseen.”

This means you should have hope for tomorrow, recovery, and success.

Hope can bring you through challenging times and allow you to see that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

2. Believe in a greater power. Having faith can also mean believing in something bigger than you, like God.

If you have nothing to believe in, it may prove quite difficult to win the war against your addiction.

It’s never too late to reconnect with your faith.

3. Develop a courageous attitude. Courage will help you face your addiction and then battle it through, regardless of what that addiction is.

Your sense of courage is stronger than you probably know! Look deep within yourself to find it and bring it out.

4. Draw on your inner strength. Like courage, we all have an inner strength that makes us stronger than we realize.

When you draw on your inner strength you have greater power to face challenges and overcome them.

5. Be patient and persevere. Patience and perseverance will help carry you through the long journey to recovery.

It takes time to overcome an addiction, but it can be done.

Take things one day at a time and fully believe that things will get better.

Keep your end goal in mind and persist in your efforts to get there.

If you can’t take it one day at a time, then begin with one hour at a time.

Hours will become days, days will become weeks, and before you know it, you’re cured of the addiction that plagued you.

6. Request help and support. Support from your friends, family members, neighbors, clergy, coworkers, social groups, or any other type of support system is crucial to your recovery.

There are likely many support groups – both online and in-person – that focus on your particular addiction.

Seek out this type of support group. You’ll find specialists in overcoming your specific addiction, as well as those who’ve experienced your pain.

Don’t forget to support yourself! Give yourself rewards at different milestones of your recovery.

In order to succeed at your endeavors, it’s important to understand that you do have an addiction.

Once you’ve accepted this, you’ll be ready to take the necessary steps to achieve power over your addiction and take back your life.

Yes, overcoming an addiction is a challenging task. However, when you use these solutions to help you each day, success can be yours!

How can addictions cause you pain and sadness?

How can you help someone recover from their addictions?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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October 18, 2018February 15, 2018

Know how to listen and you will profit even from those who talk badly. – Plutarch

October 18, 2018February 15, 2018

Simple Active Listening Techniques Anyone Can Use

Being heard and understood is a need for every member of the human family. We all want to know the people in our lives care about us.

Having someone listen and respond to your needs can help you feel important.

Conversely, you give others a boost when you listen carefully to them.

This is where active listening techniques becomes important.

Maybe you haven’t heard of active listening before.

Basically, it’s listening with the intent of understanding the total meaning of what’s being said.

You do this by allowing the person to speak without interruption, and then you repeat back what they said.

The goal of active listening is to improve understanding between both parties.

You may not believe it, but there’s more to listening than merely being quiet.

In fact, someone who’s an active listener will encourage the speaker to talk, try to clarify any points they don’t understand, and be sure they’re aware of the speaker’s intent.

An active listener will enable the speaker to feel like they’ve truly been heard and understood.

Before you begin a conversation, especially if the subject matter is important, be sure you’re in a location where you won’t be interrupted by noise or distractions.

This sets the stage for a meaningful conversation.

Here are some active listening techniques you can use to improve your communications:

1. Be attentive. Pay attention to the person speaking with you.

Stay focused on what they’re saying, without trying to anticipate what they’re going to say next. Stay in the moment.

2. Respect the speaker. Even if you think you know what they’re going to say, try to listen to what’s actually being said.

3. Pay attention to both verbal and nonverbal clues. Body language, facial expressions, and posture can all provide a detailed picture of what’s going on.

4. Keep your attitude in check. Avoid confrontation or anger.

You’re not trying to win an argument; you’re trying to understand the person with whom you’re speaking.

5. Avoid letting your personal preferences affect how you listen. Try to keep your personal beliefs from clouding the speaker’s statements.

6. Don’t jump to conclusions. Regardless of what the speaker says, don’t make assumptions or judgments about what they said.

Find out all the facts and ask questions if you need to.

For example, if you see someone who’s unshaven and poorly dressed you might deduce he’s homeless.

The case may be that his wife had to be rushed to the hospital to deliver their baby and he didn’t have time to clean up first.

You just can’t make assumptions.

If you don’t understand what’s being said, clarify by asking questions. Refrain from interrupting.

Ask your questions in an even tone of voice when the speaker pauses.

7. Try not to become distracted or lose track of what’s being said.

Daydreaming about what you need at the grocery store won’t help your friend in need, and if you lose track of the conversation you’ll come across as uncaring.

8. Give appropriate nonverbal clues. When you’re actively listening to someone, your body language will show whether you’re paying attention or not.

Look the speaker in the eye while they’re talking and try to maintain eye contact as long as it’s comfortable for both of you.

Reaching out and touching their arm or shoulder will also help the person you’re speaking with recognize that you’re interested in what they’re saying.

Nodding your head is another indication that you’re listening.

9. Repeat what you heard. This lets the speaker know that you’re really listening.

Also, when you say what you understood, it gives them a chance to clarify any miscommunication.

You can learn how to listen actively. It doesn’t take long and the results will be worth the effort.

You, your spouse, business partner, co-worker, or children will all benefit from learning and employing these simple active listening techniques.

How can active listening show that you value the person speaking to you?

How do you feel when someone listens to you?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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October 17, 2018February 15, 2018

If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it. – Mary Engelbreit

October 17, 2018February 15, 2018

Learning To Cope With Things Out of Our Control

At some point in your life, you’ve no doubt had to deal with a situation that was out of your control.

Whether it’s a car accident, financial difficulties, or other challenge, these events cause stress and frustration, which negatively impact your health and mental outlook on life.

Learning how to cope with events you can’t control will help keep you in a positive frame of mind and alleviate your stress.

Consider the Serenity Prayer, written by Reinhold Niebuhr:

“God grant me the serenity

To accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can,

And wisdom to know the difference.”

The words of this prayer exemplify the solution to a problem that plagues all of us.

Once you’ve come to terms with the fact that you can control only your own actions (and reactions), you can begin to find peace of mind.

What Can You Control?

Worrying about the people or events in your life that you can’t control can cause all kinds of stress-related health problems, such as angina, high blood pressure, and sleeping difficulties.

If you need to feel more in control of your life, focus on those things that you can physically change.

Who you decide to accept as your friends and spend your time with is something you can definitely control.

It may not be easy to meet new friends, but the opportunities are plentiful if you look for them.

Being around negative people can drag your attitude down, since you adopt the mood of people around you.

If you have people in your life who aren’t encouraging you to fulfill your potential, find other people to surround yourself with.

Having the support of people who believe in you will propel you toward reaching your lifelong goals.

Live One Day at a Time

When you intentionally consider each day a gift, your struggles don’t seem as dire.

While life does deal some bad hands, such as death, divorce, and financial challenges, how you cope during these hardships can make you stronger or break you.

When you purposely feel gratitude for the good moments within each day, you can genuinely start to accept your struggles as a path to a new beginning.

Coping with Financial Difficulties

One of the most stressful situations is coping with financial difficulties.

Loss of a job often means having to give up things you’ve worked hard to acquire.

If you’re having a difficult time accepting that you have to cut expenses and give up the comfortable things in life, even temporarily, it helps to remember that it could be worse.

Be grateful for having your home and your health because there are many people in the world who have neither.

Once you know you can be happy with less, you can focus again on achieving your goals.

By accepting that you can’t change some things, you’ll become more powerful in changing the things that you do have control over.

You’ll free yourself from the negative thoughts and emotions that can stifle you into sad complacence.

Use these tips to help you cope with things out of your control, and you’ll find peace, joy, and the passion to persevere through all challenges.

What do you do when you experience things that are out of your control?

How can you learn from them?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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October 16, 2018February 15, 2018

Never give up on something that you can’t go a day without thinking about. – Unknown

October 16, 2018February 15, 2018

Learning the Value of Sacrifices: Why It’s Important to Make Sacrifices in Relationships

When you love someone and you have their best interest at heart, you may be willing to sacrifice some of what you want in order to give your loved one what they want.

It’s common for spouses to make sacrifices for one another and parents to sacrifice for their children.

It’s important to learn the value of sacrifices even though they may not be pleasant.

Many experts feel that the willingness to set aside one’s own desires for the benefit of another is a good thing.

It shows true love and commitment when you can put your partner’s needs ahead of your own desires.

Your Attitude Toward Sacrifices

Some women feel they’ve made too many sacrifices for their partners.

They may have given up their dream to hold a certain job or put off going to school.

At first the sacrifice may have been for the partner’s benefit, but then came children.

The sacrifices continued until the dream they once had merely faded away.

What’s wrong with this picture?

Was the woman the only one who made sacrifices for the relationship and the family?

Is she using her choices as excuses for not pursuing dreams when she could’ve still done so?

How you view sacrifice is what matters!

You can see the sacrifices you make as a choice for what really matters, rather than something that you have to give up.

If you’re committed to your relationship, it’s possible you won’t even see your willingness to give something up for your partner’s benefit as a sacrifice at all!

Make Good Choices in Your Sacrifices

You want to be sure, however, that you make sacrifices for good reasons and that your partner also sacrifices for you.

Marriages and partnerships are supposed to be for the benefit of both partners. Therefore, sacrifices must go both ways.

It’s important that you never feel like you’re forced to make a sacrifice. It must be something that you do willingly, with no regrets.

In addition, your sacrifices should never compromise your morals or personal values.

These types of sacrifices will most certainly leave you with regret and feelings of guilt.

Unfortunately, the partner who would ask you to compromise your values may not the best partner for you.

Values such as these should never be compromised for someone else:

1. Honesty. If you feel you’re being asked to sacrifice honesty to help a loved one out, explain why this is a sacrifice you cannot make.

2. Loyalty. Loyalty is part of who you are, deep on the inside, and giving that up would mean giving up a part of yourself.

Agreeing to do so would only sour the relationship further down the road.

3. Faithfulness. What do you do if you find out your partner has cheated?

If fidelity is a value you hold dear, it’s unlikely the relationship will survive.

It’s possible, however, to learn to forgive, but it may be more difficult to learn to trust again.

Any relationship you enter into is going to require some give and take by each partner.

Be willing to sacrifice, choose wisely in your sacrifices, and your relationship will thrive!

When was the last time you had to sacrifice something for your relationship?

How did it make your relationship stronger?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

Before you leave…

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Posts

Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle. – Ken Hakuta

Step-by-Step Ways to Plan a Budget

I allow myself to rise above the challenges by being proactive.

Solutions to Overcoming Addiction

Know how to listen and you will profit even from those who talk badly. – Plutarch

Simple Active Listening Techniques Anyone Can Use

If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it. – Mary Engelbreit

Learning To Cope With Things Out of Our Control

Never give up on something that you can’t go a day without thinking about. – Unknown

Learning the Value of Sacrifices: Why It’s Important to Make Sacrifices in Relationships