family – Personal Growth Cafe

October 23, 2019March 27, 2018

Seven Ways to Reduce Stress in Your Home

Does this picture describe your happy home?

The baby’s crying while you hurriedly put the fast food on the table, the dog is throwing up on the floor, the hubby’s got the TV on full-blast, and your teenager just angrily slammed the door on his way out.

Unfortunately, it’s a typical scene for many of us.

However, the good news is that it doesn’t have to be this way.

There are, in fact, things you can do to ease this stress and create a more harmonious environment so that you and your family can look forward to coming home!

Although some degree of stress is inherent as you deal with the varying phases of your family members, if you strive to uphold a core set of values and go with the flow, you can maintain a happy and healthy home.

Here are some specific ways you can reduce the stress at home:

1. Get organized. Life can quickly become chaotic when you don’t maintain organization.

An organized home runs smoothly, while an unorganized home leads to stress and lost time.

A good tip is to start small with your organization efforts.

Start with one room or even a portion of a room.

The idea is to think of it as a series of small projects instead of one overwhelmingly huge one.

2. Communicate. Your family will certainly benefit from actively working on communication skills.

When you fail to communicate effectively, you may not get what you want and can even cause upsetting misunderstandings.

Working on communication will allow all family members to feel loved and appreciated and help the household run efficiently.

3. Eat dinner together. Everyone in your family likely has a busy life of their own.

It’s easy to suddenly realize that you have no idea what’s going on with your spouse or child.

When you make it a point to eat dinner together every night, you make time to connect with your family.

You’ll learn how to work as one even with busy lifestyles.

4. Have fun together. It’s important to schedule time to have fun together as a family, even if these times can’t be as often as you’d like.

Schedule family nights in advance and allow each family member a chance to pick that evening’s activity.

5. Show unconditional love. Be sure to practice the art of unconditional love with your family.

This leads to secure attachments and will ultimately keep everyone in your family happy and stress-free.

Children and parents alike need to know that, when they make mistakes, they have a loving family that will back them up and forgive them.

6. Give support. Go out of your way for your family members.

It might not be an ideal Friday night to go to your daughter’s art show, but just think of how they’ll feel when they see that they have your love and support.

Actively express your support by really being there for your family – no matter what.

Just thinking about how much you love them is not enough!

7. Family rules. Having a set of family rules will help with organization and allow everyone to know what’s expected of them.

Schedule a family meeting to establish the house rules.

Make sure everyone has a chance to participate and share his or her concerns.

You’ll likely find a compromise that allows everyone to be happy.

A happy and stress free home is one built on love.

Don’t be too hard on yourself and others, and you’ll have the basis for creating an excellent home life.

What are the major causes of stress in your family?

What is your favorite bonding time with the family to reduce stress?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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September 4, 2019March 26, 2018

My commitment to my loved ones is building forever roots.

My highest priority is for those I love.

Showing them my love in all that I do and say is a positive force that brings lasting happiness to us all.

I show my commitment to my family even in my everyday, routine activities.

When I cook a meal, I do it with love.

Not only do I foster good nutrition in my choices, but I also put special touches on it to let them know I care.

Little things like pancakes in the shape of Mickey Mouse or heart-shaped cakes bring more fun and love into our life!

When I work, I know that I am doing it not only for myself, but for my family in order to provide the things we need and want.

This gives me motivation and patience to persevere even when work may be irritating.

When I am at home with my family, I make time for each and every person.

This lets them know how special and loved they are.

They know that, no matter what, I’ll always be there for them.

The way I treat my loved ones nurtures and supports them.

I purposely build their confidence in themselves and avoid ever saying anything that berates them.

I respect them and their thoughts and ideas.

As a result, my spouse is happy and my children are growing into confident, joyful adults, making the same commitment to nurture their loved ones as well. It’s a never-ending cycle of love!

Today, I plan to spend some time with each member of my family and let my love shine through in my thoughts, words, and actions.

How can you show your love to your family in your everyday activities?

How have you included time in your schedule for family activities?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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June 3, 2019March 22, 2018

Top Five Family Stress Relief Strategies

Stress comes in all forms and from all directions, especially for families in these super busy, technologically advanced, yet tough economic times.

However, even with the technology we’ve available to us, one of the biggest causes of stress in a family is lack of communication.

The unfortunate reality is that kids communicate with seemingly everyone but their family through texting, email, Facebook, MySpace, or Twitter.

Nowadays it can be tough to get through to your kids, which makes it a challenge to strengthen your family’s bond.

Getting Involved with Your Kids

One way to get more involved with your kids is to start communicating in a way that they’ll actually listen.

This may mean that you need to learn how to text, email and get on the social networks your kids are on.

The idea is to be a source of support for your child, and that means you need to be an active player in their life, even if they push you away.

Even if you get active in your child’s life online, the best way to communicate with your kids is while they’re at home.

Talk to them face to face and don’t be afraid to ask questions.

You might be surprised at how they respond.

At first it may seem awkward, but the more you do it, the easier communication becomes.

Communication with Your Spouse

If you’re lacking an open line of communication with your spouse, one reason may be that you’re not speaking each other’s love language or understanding their relating style.

This means that you need to discover what your spouse responds to the best.

Is it touch, the words you say, gifts, acts of service, or spending quality time together?

Once you know how to show love to your spouse, show it abundantly!

Also, listen to your spouse’s feelings, as this will often give you ideas about how you can fill their love tank.

If your spouse says something along the lines of “You never touch me anymore” or she wants to hold hands all the time, her love language is physical touch.

If your spouse often uses the phrase “We never spend any time together,” and likes to just sit and talk, their love language is quality time.

Spend Quality Time With Your Family

Another big stress on today’s family is not spending enough time together.

This is most likely because everyone is so busily involved in other activities that you barely have time to yourself, let alone one another.

So, how can you make time to spend with your family?

Set aside at least one day out of each week and deem it family day or game night.

Spending quality time with your family shows that you’re interested in what they’re doing and that you care about them.

Often teens think that their parents don’t care about them because they’re never home, or they feel that their parents play a passive role in their lives.

And because kids and teens often don’t spend quality time with their families, they go elsewhere to get the attention they crave.

Unfortunately, elsewhere may not be a good place for your kids to be!

Ensure you make time for your spouse.

Alone time is important for all marriages so you can continue to strengthen your relationship and explore one another’s dreams and desires for the family unit.

Make sure your family enjoys at least one meal together each day. Statistics show families that eat together, stay together.

Children do better in school and the overall atmosphere in the home is simply happier when you make eating together a priority.

The Financial Burden

Financial problems are another cause of major stress in families today.

Often, when the parents aren’t in control of their finances, their children suffer the same financial burdens later on in life.

As parents, you must teach your children financial responsibility from an early age.

Get your little ones a piggy bank to help them learn about the importance of saving money.

As they get older, include them in the budget planning and bill paying.

Help them understand the concept of financial responsibility.

Children need to know that money must be earned and that your debit or credit card isn’t magically filled with money all the time.

To recap, The Top 5 Family Stress Relievers are:

1. Communicate by speaking directly to your family.

2. Learn what love language your children and spouse speaks.

3. Spend time quality time together as a family with a family day or family game night.

4. Sit down for at least one meal a day with each other.

5. Openly discuss your finances and financial situation with your family.

Incorporating these strategies into your family life will help you have a more open relationship with each family member.

Plus, you’ll be able to relieve the stress and tension and replace it with joy, health, and happiness!

What are your favorite activities as a family?

How has this strengthened the bond that you have?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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April 27, 2019March 13, 2018

I allow my family to be who they are. I let go of comparing them to anyone.

I accept my family members without comparing them to others because I believe the only way they can truly develop to their full potential is by being granted the freedom to be themselves.

We all have our strengths and weaknesses; that’s why we live in families and communities.

We need each other to be productive and well rounded because no one person is enough by himself.

We are like the colors in a beautiful mosaic.

Perhaps I am more drawn to the golds or reds, but if the artist had splashed only one bright color on the canvas, where would the mastery and symmetry be?

The same holds true with people.

I let go of the idea that my spouse or child should be the social equivalent of red or gold and let them be brown, blue, or green.

They may not be as flashy as some others; they may not catch the eye as quickly or draw as much praise, but I love them for who they are.

I love my family.

I choose to focus my energy into helping them develop to their full potential so they can be fulfilled and contribute their own unique qualities to the world.

How do you value the different roles people play in society?

How are you helping your family discover and develop who they are?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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April 5, 2019March 12, 2018

The only rock I know that stays steady, and the only institution I know that works, is the family. – Lee Iacocca

March 14, 2019March 13, 2018

I free myself of the stress to be everything for my family. They love me for who I am.

I free myself of the need to be a super hero because I know that it is in my family’s best interest for me to teach them to be self-sufficient.

My children need to know that they are not responsible for my happiness.

Yes, they definitely add to it!

But by developing other areas in my life, I free them of the pressure of feeling that my happiness depends upon them.

My children look to me as an example of what it means to be an adult, and they need me to demonstrate the path to a fulfilling life.

By allowing them to see me as a whole person rather than a slave, I am freeing them to be equally self-fulfilled.

My example provides a model of healthy adult living from which they can draw as they branch out and discover their own interests and purposes.

By having them take some responsibility for their own well being in doing age appropriate tasks, I allow them the chance to develop both skills and confidence.

Even if I may be able to do a task more efficiently, I allow them the opportunity for the growth and personal development that comes from stretching themselves.

I recognize the difference between being reliance and being loved.

I know that my children will rely on me less and less the older they get.

This is a good thing.

I set them free to be all they can be, knowing they love me not for what I do for them, but for who I am.

How are you modeling the path to a fulfilling life for your children?

What is one task you could turn over to your children this week?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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March 13, 2019March 13, 2018

I have a wonderful family tree that shades me in times of change in my life.

My family surrounds me and covers me when things become difficult or scary in my life.

Like a strong oak tree with branches that offer cool shade from the glaring sun, my family shades and protects me.

Rather than being lessened by the shade, I am made stronger and revived by it.

As I grew up, I would often feel that I should be able to handle everything myself; needing my family meant that I was not able to make it on my own.

I felt ashamed if I needed to call my mother when someone broke my heart.

I felt embarrassed that I needed my father to come help me with my new home.

I felt weak when I needed to talk with my siblings about the difficulties of life.

Then I realized that my family strengthens me, not weakens me.

Today, I am grateful to lean on my mother when my heart is broken, I happily ask my father to come help me with tasks at home, and I cheerfully call my siblings to vent my daily difficulties.

I feel good about the great relationship we have and enjoy the cool protection of the shade of my family tree.

How has your family made you stronger?

How have you been protected by your family tree?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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March 6, 2019March 13, 2018

I trust in the love and support of my family.

I trust in the love and support of my family because I know that we are bonded far deeper and more permanently than any mere friendship.

We have a common history and heritage with intertwined memories and dreams.

Our past, present and future are linked with each other.

For these reasons, I make the relationship within my family a priority.

I acknowledge that sometimes we see less than eye-to-eye on matters, yet the fact that we are interconnected for life gives me the security to dig deep and work toward understanding and solutions.

While I sometimes wish I could pick and choose my family as I do my friends, I know that relating to my own kin develops far more depth to my character.

In the end, it’s my family who will stick by me when the going gets tough.

I invest in the valuable bonds of my family relationships by addressing conflict when it arises rather than allowing it to simmer.

I value our relationship far too highly to allow it to be corroded that way.

I also deepen our bonds when I simply spend time with them.

I don’t need an excuse to have dinner with them, go shopping together, break out the board games, or simply sit and chat.

When I am with my family, I can be myself. I treasure that and do whatever I can to build on it.

How do you show your family that they are a priority to you?

When did you last spend time with your family for no particular reason?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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March 3, 2019March 13, 2018

My family is a source of healing energy for me.

My family is a source of healing energy for me because I know that with them I can truly be myself.

While I always try to be my best no matter who I am with, I know that my family loves me unconditionally and that they want me to be me.

I am free from pressure when I am with my family because I know that their love for me is not dependent on my performance.

While I also have others in my life who back me up and help me out, I realize that most people who do so have at least some self-interest at heart.

This is not bad; it’s just life!

But with my family, I am confident that their love is based solely and permanently on the simple fact that we are family.

And nothing can ever change that.

I find it easy to relax with my family.

Because they know me inside and out, I am able to let go of the tendency to want to put on a show.

If I am happy or excited about something, I share it with them.

If I am sad or anxious, I share that as well.

I know my family wants to be a part of my inner life as much as I want to be a part of theirs.

I can speak the truth around them because I know that our relationship is based on authenticity and trust.

Life can be so challenging so I truly cherish my family’s support.

I love having this group of people with whom I can laugh or cry, share my deepest fears or fondest dreams, and who will always be a part of my life, no matter what.

How do you show you appreciate all that your family brings to your life?

How do you show your family that you care about their lives?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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January 13, 2019February 21, 2018

I love and accept my family as a mother loves her child.

The bond between a mother and her child is stronger than steel.

Mothers love and forgive their children unconditionally.

Children know that when they run to mom they always find open arms.

Such is the love I have for my family.

The treasure hunter in me regularly seeks and finds the embodiment of hidden treasure in the richness of my family.

I love my family because they make my life great.

My family is a soft pillow that I can rest my head on.

I crave time with my family and my heart delights in watching them grow.

I am affectionate with my loved ones.

My supply of hugs and kisses is always fully stocked.

When I speak to my family, I use soft words of admiration because my goal is to nurture their self-esteem.

I take care of my family.

Selflessly, I put their wants even before my own needs.

My family is my gift from my Creator.

Each member of my amazing family has a special place in my heart and a distinctive trait that I adore.

There is nothing my family members can do to lose my love.

My heart toward them is filled with forgiveness, keeping no record of their offenses.

When we have disagreements, we still value each other over our differences.

Just as a mother forgets her children’s misconduct, my family retains no recollection or history of wrongdoings.

I get along with my loved ones and I do my best to ensure that we get along with one another.

My family and I share many traditions that bring us closer together and help us cherish our time with one another.

What distinctive traits does each of your family members have?

What kind of words do you use with yourfamily?

Talk about that in the Personal Growth Cafe Community!

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